Swinging Energy With Other Moms
Three Things I Learned Entering My Woo-Woo Era with Random Moms on Zoom
When I was a kid, I remember watching movies where women, primarily middle-aged white women, would do things that seemed ridiculous: yelling at the sky, chasing energies, and dancing in weird motions to release stress. Last week, I became one of those women – just in brown skin form.
Another mother at my kids' daycare invited me to a Zoom call titled "Parenting Through These Times." My children are young, so I hadn't really considered what "parenting through these times" meant. I figured by the time they developed any real awareness, the times would have changed. I joined anyway, curious if I was missing something important. Turns out, I missed a lot – including jumping around my living room and throwing imaginary energy balls.
The call reminded me that parenting tools serve both you and your children. My kids didn't need support at that moment – I did. And in typical mother fashion, I didn't even realize it until I started hurling energy.
I had been drifting in a cloud, lacking tools to handle the negative energy weighing me down. As a journalist – literally a bearer of bad news – I carry more negative energy than most. I'd tried balancing this by countering bad events with good ones: offsetting a failed marketing campaign by celebrating sold-out books at an event, or telling a happy story after reporting a tragic one.
But I hadn't taken control. Fortunately, there are helpful ways to do this. Here are three techniques I learned – my Mother's Day gift to other moms parenting through these times. Even if you're not a mother, these might help, or you can share them with someone who needs them.
1. Lineages
During one exercise, they asked us to call on our lineages by naming our children, mother, and grandmother. I didn't get it initially, but understood later after talking to a friend – a Black woman who finds hope by remembering what her grandmother endured during Jim Crow and other injustices while continuing to move forward. She draws strength from her late grandmother's memory to face today's challenges. This exemplifies what happens when you call on your lineage.
You tap into your grandmother's strength. My mother and grandmother survived civil war in Nigeria and emerged as beautiful, peaceful people. I need that energy today.
2. Energizing Exercises
Rub your hands together until you feel heat, then slowly pull them apart while feeling the energy between them. Shape that energy into a ball and swing it around, even if you look a little ridiculous.
Focus on your joints too – they apparently store negative energy. Move your joints in circles, backward and forward, releasing what doesn't serve you.
3. Down the River
Close your eyes and visualize a creek or stream. Imagine filling a container, lily pad, or vessel with whatever burden you want to release. I struggled to identify what to let go of, while other mothers mentioned control or parenting failures they experienced while still healing. Whatever it is, place it in the basket and watch it float away.
What are some tools you are using? Here for the woo-woo stuff and the practical.
I felt surprisingly energized after these exercises. They offered small but significant new tools to manage the stress of everything happening around us. It's not perfect, but these days I'll take whatever help I can get.
The Herd World
Revisions and Titles?
I'm currently working on revisions for Book 2 of The Herd (pre-order here), which feels like rewriting the entire book—a challenging but necessary process. I'm leaning towards titling it "Gaslight Girl," as this installment follows Feonix into the “Deep State” after her experiences in the news entity from the first book. The “Deep State” in my series refers to government in general, drawing specifically from my time at the State Department.
It's been enjoyable to write, blending elements of truth that sometimes seem stranger than fiction with fantastical components.
Recently, I've had the pleasure of meeting with readers who provided thoughtful feedback and shared what they loved about the first book. These interactions have been incredibly rewarding—I even had coffee with one amazing reader and found myself wishing we could all be friends, which is partly why I created this space for ongoing conversations about the series.
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